Kim Kardashian: one of the most famous women in the world. Why, you ask? I honestly don’t know. But due to that fact that so many people know and seem to love her, she must be doing something right.
I suppose, with that many around-the-globe followers, she’d be quite well-versed on all things culture, people, and societal politics; not to mention the top 10 causes of suffering in the world today. That just comes with the job of being famous, right? Researching and understanding why people suffer? Of course, this makes me wonder… if you asked Kim K. to explain chronic disease, how do you think she’d do it? Here’s how I think it would go:
Kim, tell us what you know about…
HAE?
“Wait. Let me look it up. Wait. Selfie. Would HAE make my lips bigger? I wouldn’t hate that. Do they have it at Georgio Armani? I think my sister has it.”
HoFH?
“Is that a band?”
“Didn’t Rihanna write a song about that? That was my jam! Bum bum be dum / bum bum be dum dum.”
“What, you’re like addicted to drugs or something? Or is that the one where all your skin falls off? Or was that the Black Plague?”
POTS?
“No, thanks.”
“I have no idea, but it’s fun to say. Behçet’s. Beeehhhcet’s! BehCET’S. BEHcet’s.”
Asperger’s?
“What did you call me?”
“I know this one! That’s the one where you shake a lot, right? I have that sometimes, like when I’m really nervous, or hungry, or drank too much coffee. It’s really scary, and I feel like not everyone understands.”
“Why does that name sound so familiar? I must have dated him in college… I could have repressed it. I’ve dated lots of guys in my life; most were mistakes.”
Multiple Sclerosis?
“Well, your body can only handle so much sclerosises. If you have too many, you get sick and die.”
“Sounds like a clothing line. Is that a clothing line? It should be. I’m surprised I don’t know it.”
“Ohh, that’s pretty! One sec. [aside] KANYE! What do you think of ‘Hemophilia’ as a girl’s name? [end aside] He likes it. [smiles]”
